Karen Fenessey 'We've given the green light to battalions of orange schoolgirls to repeatedly copulate with train conductors and weathermen. And nobody needs to see that.' read more...
News Briefly
Schools urge government to make drug slightly more expensive and a lot more dangerous "We're only trying not to help," says National Association of Head Teachers
'We just assumed it was first years' semen' says top public school "If something tastes funny round here it usually means there's a load of spunk in it," admits spokesman
Your stars: taurus
This week you will suggest an insurance scheme for dogs and then abandon it four days later because you're an over-rated arsewit who has no business running the Home Office.
THE BBC last night defended a new series that hopes to find the best new under 14 pole dancer in Britain.
TONY Blair has backed Colonel Gaddafi's call for the annihilation of everyone in Switzerland.
THE amusement factor of the first commercially available jetpack lasts about five minutes, it emerged last night.
MANCHESTER City defender Wayne Bridge today admitted his World Cup dream had been destroyed by the penis of John Terry.
