Women paid less because they’re smaller, say businesses

WOMEN do not need salaries as high as men because there is less of them to pay, businesses have insisted.

Aspirational parents discourage toddler from waving to binmen

A TWO-YEAR-OLD'S parents are discouraging him from thinking of binmen, postmen or men driving big diggers as role models.

Office beauty claimed with territorial bouquet

AN ATTRACTIVE woman has been marked as an alpha male’s property with a territorial Valentine’s bouquet.

Public reminded that actors are full of shit

LISTENING to what actors think is stupid because they are stupid, it has been confirmed.

Syrian refugees 'now have no excuse not to return to bombsites'

THE Syrian ceasefire means refugees have no reason not to go back to the blasted ruins of their homes, say European leaders.

Jeremy Hunt’s mum proud of him ‘in spite of everything’

THE mother of Jeremy Hunt remains proud of him, no matter what anyone says.

Scientists completely fail to explain ‘gravitational waves’

SCIENTISTS are under attack after making a huge fuss about ‘gravitational waves’ then failing to explain what they are.

All junior doctors to retrain as brand managers

ALL 53,000 junior doctors are to retrain as corporate brand managers for the same pay and no working weekends.