Animals Headlines

BBC2 Launches New Series Of 'Date My Cat'

THE BBC has fired the first shot in the summer ratings war with a new series of the popular reality show Date My Cat.

Alex Salmond Killed Your Guinea Pig, Blair Tells Scots Children

IN his final salvo of the election campaign Tony Blair has accused SNP leader Alex Salmond of killing the guinea pigs of thousands of Scottish children.

Disabled Identity Thieves Get NHS Help Dogs

DISABLED identity thieves are to get assistance dogs on the NHS to help them lead more independent criminal lives, The Daily Mash can reveal. 

Cows Declare War On Sheep

RURAL Britain is bracing itself for bloodshed and mass destruction after the cows declared war on the sheep.