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NOSTRADAMUS PREDICTED 2010 'WOULD BE BAD YEAR FOR BUY-TO-LET'
05-03-10

ImageTHE prophecies of Nostradamus include warnings about fluctuations in the UK property market, it was claimed yesterday.

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SCOTTISH AND SOUTHERN CUTS PRICES JUST IN TIME FOR SUMMER
05-03-10

Image SCOTTISH and Southern Energy has made the bold move of cutting its prices to coincide with it getting lighter and warmer of an evening.
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The Daily Mash All-You-Need-to-Know Guide to UK Inflation
16-02-10
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HONDA JAZZ FILLED WITH SCORPIONS
10-02-10

ImageCAR giant Honda last night confirmed that its Jazz supermini hatchback is full of deadly scorpions.

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LABOUR BOTTLES THE TASTE OF FAILURE
10-02-10

ImageTHE Labour Party has combined the essence of disappointment, inertia and broken promises in a unique sauce that voters can add to their food.

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YES, ETHEL AUSTIN WAS STILL GOING, SAY ADMINISTRATORS
09-02-10

ImageADMINISTRATORS were last night called in to retail chain Ethel Austin, as thousands insisted it definitely went out of business no later than 1961.

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TOYOTA URGED TO LEAVE STING'S PRIUS ALONE
05-02-10

ImageTOYOTA was last night urged to fix the brakes on more than 250,000 Prius hybrids as quickly as possible, except Sting's.

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FAIRYTALE COMES TRUE AS SKANK MARRIES CAGE FIGHTER
03-02-10

ImageIT is every little girl's dream - to carve out a career as a fake-breasted, professional skank and then marry her perfect cage fighter in a Las Vegas casino.

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HEATHROW STAFF TO GIGGLE AT YOUR TINY PENIS
02-02-10

ImageSECURITY staff at Heathrow airport are today preparing to snigger uncontrollably at your small, sad penis.

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