THE prophecies of Nostradamus include warnings about fluctuations in the UK property market, it was claimed yesterday.
CAR giant Honda last night confirmed that its Jazz supermini hatchback is full of deadly scorpions.
THE Labour Party has combined the essence of disappointment, inertia and broken promises in a unique sauce that voters can add to their food.
ADMINISTRATORS were last night called in to retail chain Ethel Austin, as thousands insisted it definitely went out of business no later than 1961.
TOYOTA was last night urged to fix the brakes on more than 250,000 Prius hybrids as quickly as possible, except Sting's.
IT is every little girl's dream - to carve out a career as a fake-breasted, professional skank and then marry her perfect cage fighter in a Las Vegas casino.
SECURITY staff at Heathrow airport are today preparing to snigger uncontrollably at your small, sad penis.
THE prophecies of Nostradamus include warnings about fluctuations in the UK property market, it was claimed yesterday.
SCOTTISH and Southern Energy has made the bold move of cutting its prices to coincide with it getting lighter and warmer of an evening. 
CAR giant Honda last night confirmed that its Jazz supermini hatchback is full of deadly scorpions.
THE Labour Party has combined the essence of disappointment, inertia and broken promises in a unique sauce that voters can add to their food.
ADMINISTRATORS were last night called in to retail chain Ethel Austin, as thousands insisted it definitely went out of business no later than 1961.
SECURITY staff at Heathrow airport are today preparing to snigger uncontrollably at your small, sad penis.