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SCHOOL LEAVERS NOT EVEN CLEVER ENOUGH TO WORK AT TESCO, SAYS TESCO BOSS
14-10-09

ImageBRITAIN'S education system must be in a right old state if school leavers are not even qualified to work at Tesco, the boss of Tesco warned last night.

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COME AND SEE OUR HOT LESBIANS, SAYS SWINDON
09-10-09

ImageSWINDON is a hotbed of unbridled lesbian sex, the town's borough council claimed last night.

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PAT AND JESS TRADE INSULTS OVER STRIKE ACTION
08-10-09

ImageBRITAIN'S leading postman and his long-standing colleague last night exchanged vicious insults in an acrimonious split over proposed strike action.

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WE WILL NEVER JUDGE YOU, SAY GREGGS
06-10-09

ImageGREGGS the baker last night assured its customers it would never ever judge them.

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MICROSOFT OFFERS STUDENTS CUT-PRICE INFURIATING CRAP
18-09-09

ImageSTUDENTS can have Windows 7 irritate the shit out of them for a reduced fee of £30, Microsoft has announced.

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ONLY WAY TO SAVE BLACKPOOL TOURISM IS TO DESTROY REST OF UK, SAY EXPERTS
18-09-09

ImageBLACKPOOL'S  tourism industry can be saved if the rest of the United Kingdom is reduced to charred, smouldering rubble, it was claimed last night.

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BBC DISMANTLES ROBERT PESTON
09-09-09

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THE BBC has begun dismantling Robert Peston in the clearest signal so far that the recession is over.
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SEARCH BEGINS FOR SOCIALLY USEFUL BUSINESS
27-08-09

ImageACROSS the UK the search has begun for a business that is socially useful.

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FILE-SHARE CRACKDOWN 'BREACHES FUNDAMENTAL RIGHT TO STEAL'
26-08-09

ImagePLANS to cut-off the internet connections of people who share films and music have been branded an attack on the basic right to steal other people's property.

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