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22-09-09 |
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Psychic Bob Libra (23 SEP-23 OCT)
The sun in Libra brings up old issues in your relationship with your partner that both of you had hoped you had laid to rest for good. How very, very helpful. Prick. |
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15-09-09 |
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Psychic Bob Virgo (23 AUG-22 SEP)
As the flames dance shadows across your wide-eyed, cackling face and the sound of sirens grows ever louder, there can be no doubt that branch of Wetherspoons will never short-change you again. |
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02-09-09 |
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Psychic Bob Virgo (23 AUG-22 SEP)
As the fat lorry driver tosses a crumpled £20 note into the toilet bowl before doing up his flies and leaving the cubicle, it dawns on you that your acting career really isn't going according to schedule.
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25-08-09 |
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 Psychic Bob
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)
Sex can be a beautiful expression of love, a release of pent-up desire or an escape from the daily worries of the world. But in your case, with that thing sticking out of your neck, it would be a miracle.
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18-08-09 |
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Psychic Bob Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)
Jupiter continues to make your work life hell by filling your desk drawer with medical waste and rubbing the end of his penis across your phone receiver while you’re using it. Still it is his company so he can do what he wants.
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11-08-09 |
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Psychic Bob Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)
'Indefatigable' is a useful watchword until October. After that try 'shibboleth' until mid-November, then, in the run-up to Christmas, 'pandiculation' or 'furphy'.
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05-08-09 |
Psychic Bob
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)
It's about that ringtone of yours. The one of that terrorist puppet shouting 'I Keell You!' Well, the thing is, unless you delete it immediately, I will 'keell' you. So, you know, something to think about there.
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