Celebrity

When can I stop being a wanker? asks weary Ramsay

GORDON Ramsay has asked when he will be allowed to drop his 'tough guy wanker' persona, it has emerged.

Dalai Lama claims indifference to getting 50k likes for last status update

THE Dalai Lama has claimed that he is not bothered about getting 50,000 ‘Likes' for his last Facebook post.

Piers Morgan 'to go undercover at Hogwarts'

PIERS Morgan plans to use his 'skills as a journalist' to discover the truth about a controversial school he claims was founded by JK Rowling.

Beckham still less of a prick than other footballers

DAVID Beckham's hacked emails have revealed that he is far less of a prick than most footballers.

Media still unable to find photo of Trump looking even vaguely normal

NEWS outlets are unable to find a picture of Donald Trump where he doesn't look like an absolute maniac, it has been confirmed.

Radio 4 listener to spend whole of Desert Island Discs pretending not to know who Beckham is

A RADIO 4 listener is to feign puzzlement about David Beckham’s identity throughout his appearance on Desert Island Discs.

It should never have been written or released, says Trump about Shane Richie's autobiography

DONALD Trump has slammed the writing and release of Shane Richie's autobiography From Rags to Richie.

I am a ponce, admits Hiddleston

ACTOR Tom Hiddleston has apologised for being a massive ponce.