Agony Aunt

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

Dear Holly,
My daughter-in-law recently lent me Al Gore's award winning environmental documentary, The Day After Tomorrow.

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

"All I can think of these days is how to escape the next blast from her enormous winking anus."

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

'Ken Barlow came out of the TV set and grabbed me around the neck. His eyes were burning with an intense, pink fire'.

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

'There's a guy in my office who's always got birds swarming round him, and I've heard on the grapevine that he's a homosexual.'

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

'Her other kids are called Scrooge, Rumplestiltskin, Black Beauty and Thomas the Tank Engine.'

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

Dear Holly,
I was doing a bit of weeding in the garden this weekend, and as I was crouching by the fence, I realised I could overhear the conversation of our next door neighbours.

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

Dear Holly,
My boyfriend of 3 weeks has just asked me to marry him. Even though I still don't know his middle name, and I've only seen his pee-pee once.

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

Dear Holly,
I've developed a really embarrassing problem related to my anal region.