Agony Aunt

Ask Holly: Is Britain full?

THERE is no room in this country because the celebrities are taking it all up.

Ask Holly: When I'm pouting I'm thinking about Euclidian geometry

THERE are three boys in my class called Brooklyn.

Ask Holly: That odious cretin is a major investor in Lapland

HE'S a big ugly man whose name means 'fart'.

Ask Holly: I have no previous experience in expressing genuine emotion

YOU need to start doing stupid stuff on a regular basis.

Ask Holly: Are colouring books suitable for grown men?

COLOURING in is NOT suitable for adults, and certainly not adults of a fragile state of mind.

Ask Holly: I've been married to Catherine Zeta Jones for 15 years, please help me

WHEN I grow up I'm going to marry Beyonce because my teacher says ladies are allowed to marry other ladies now.

Ask Holly: I just found out that lots of people in this country have got absolutely no money

DID you know that there's actually no such person as Peppa Pig?