If the big man can’t be bothered, why should any of the rest of us?
Drunk mummies don't make you do your homework.
Robert the Burns liked to write poems about his dinner, which is a bit weird.
Don't get too relaxed and let off an eggy fart.
The others laugh at you because you look like a bell-end.
If vaginas are like handbags, I expect the current trend is for something oversized and with a chunky zip.
Unfortunately, you can’t have fun in this world unless you pay the government loads of tax.
If you eat two Big Mac meals at once, your farts smell of petrol.