Taurus (20 APRIL - 20 MAY) Tomorrow, somebody in the bus queue will call you an egomaniac. They won't mention your name but it will be obvious they were talking about you.
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) If family values are the glue that holds society together, resentful drunken get-togethers are the Swarfega that dissolves it again.
You don't want to be strangled to death by your big sister for cutting out some pretty shapes from her One Direction tickets.
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) You've been a waiter for ten years now but still no sign of all those good things.
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) The apocalypse doesn't sound so scary when you consider it only has four horsepower.
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) They say owners start to look like their dog and that's true in your case as it died two years ago.
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) You like Willem Dafoe. He's brillent.