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CHILDREN MUST WORK OFF COST OF FLU JAB, SAY DOCS |
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09-12-09 |
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CHILDREN under five who receive swine flu vaccinations will have to work for their local GP until the debt is paid, it emerged last night.
 Could forcing babies to work for doctors finally end the madness of vaccinating them for free?
Dr William McKay, a GP from Grantham, said: "Good woman, I would be more than happy to inoculate your child on the understanding he becomes my property until the matter of five pounds and five shillings is duly settled.
"It shall be nothing too strenuous. I have some errant roof tiles that need fixed and my Jaguar could do with a vigorous buffing.
"I shall also need a small team of obedient infants to hold the nibble trays at my pre-Christmas drinks party."
The British Medical Association said that unless GPs received extra money or free child labour then they could miss important targets for earning extra money.
Dr Jospeh Turner, who runs a small, rural surgery near York, said: "I am of a mind to administer the drug to six children. I believe that should provide sufficient manpower to dredge my ornamental koi pond and de-gunge my septic tank."
He added: "I shall also require a small but strong male to crawl into my central heating duct with an adjustable spanner and a torch.
"Worry not, simple woman, I shall of course feed the child and ensure he has a kennel of his own."
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