A LOCAL cafe has a copy of today’s Guardian that will remain forever untouched by human hands.
THE combatants of BBC series Robot Wars have decided to settle their differences peacefully.
BRITONS have demanded another important issue to vote on without much thought for the consequences.
LOCALS are coming to terms with having seen their neighbour's weird knees over the weekend.
FRANCE hates foreigners and thinks it is better than neighbouring countries, it has been claimed.
TWO youths convicted of selling cannabis in Wolverhampton have been sentenced to a fortnight at Hilton Park services on the M6.
CONSPIRACY theorists have finally been convinced there is no secret society running the country because no-one could possibly believe any of this was orchestrated.
A COMPANY’S production line was halted yesterday after one of its products almost failed to be covered in pointless, annoying stickers.