Katona Forced To Go To Iceland
KERRY Katona will be doing all her shopping at Iceland from now on, the bankrupt star revealed last night.
One Woman's Week: Poles Apart
By Karen Fenessey
If one more person makes some remark to me about how 'terrific' the holidays of school teachers are and how they are so 'jealous', I will grab them by the throat and shake them until they are dead and in hell.
Satan Forced To Sell Heathrow
SATAN, the Prince of Darkness, is to launch an appeal after he was ordered to sell Heathrow.
US And Poland Sign Death To Poland Agreement
THE US and Poland yesterday signed an historic agreement which will guarantee the total destruction of the eastern European state.
Brown To Appear In Hilarious Recession Video
GORDON Brown has begun his political fightback by appearing in a hilarious video about Britain's looming economic collapse.
British Children Too Ugly, Says Glitter
GLAM rock paedophile Gary Glitter has refused to return to the United Kingdom, insisting British children are far too fat and ugly.
No Women Involved In Latest Pantyliner Advert
NO women were involved in the making of the latest advert for Always pantyliners, it was confirmed last night.
I’ve Talked Myself Into Talking Us Into A Recession, Admits Economist
A LEADING economist last night admitted he had talked himself into talking us all into a major global recession.