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the dailymash

Thursday, 19 April 2018
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News Briefly

3D to add extra dimension to professional tennis players


Hair transplant transforms Rooney into thuggish, foul-mouthed user of prostitutes, with hair


Universities failing to raid homes of people who are just studying there


Aren't Tories horrid, Cable tells unions


Relief as 'Norfolk's Justin Bieber' appears to be normal, human boy


Three year-old with an IQ of 160 shits absolutely everywhere


Meat relieved that vegetables are getting some flak for a change


SAS at home with feet up, as ever


  • Britain at war over the usual shit
  • Libyan conflict enters mental helicopters phase
  • Measles increasing among children of total and utter bloody morons
  • Bad man not shot in face
  • Smart money investing in stupid hats
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