Who's who in the Royal Box

05-07-12

As Andy Murray thrashed the living daylights out of some foreigner the Wimbledon Royal Box was once again a who’s who of people who are just so much better than scum like you. So who were the Royal guests?

1. Britain’s most important owl 2. The Duchess of Sex 3. Balding, effeminate millionaire, married to the Duchess of Sex 4. All England Club vice-chairman Frank Otter 5. Parky 6. Mary Parky 7. The teacher from The Breakfast Club 8. Dracula, £250,000 a year vampire 9. Chairman Mao, £250,000 a year Chinese maniac 10. Good Life bombshell Felicity Kendal. What a shame. 11. Sheila from the canteen has snuck in again. Cheeky bitch. 12. Man with giant Afro 13. Fuck knows. Some arsehole probably. 14. Kate Middleton’s secret mum 15. Big Ian. Not to be trifled with. 16. Steffi Graf 17. Klaatu from The Day the Earth Stood Still. Not to be trifled with. 18. The Ghost of Wimbledon

 

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