BBC LICENCE PAYERS FINED £400,000

LICENCE fee payers have been fined a record £400,000 by Ofcom for allowing the BBC to con them with a series of fake phone-in competitions.

If you can win control of the remote, you will be able to watch 'Last Choir Standing' in prison

According to the media watchdog, viewers of Comic Relief entered the competitions unaware Jonathan Ross had already used the prizes as Christmas presents for the children of Lenny Henry and Dawn French.

Meanwhile callers to Liz Kershaw's programme on Radio 6 lost all their money as the station does not actually exist.

Mark Thompson, BBC director general, has offered to pay the fine on behalf of the licence payers, stressing he has an endless supply of money for just this sort of thing.

He said: "If there is ever a shortfall we just produce a short, terrifying film telling people to GIVE US THE MONEY RIGHT FUCKING NOW, or get passed around the communal showers in Wormwood Scrubs.

"And when we've paid all the fines there should be enough left over for a new series of Pimp My Attic with Adrian Chiles."

Licence payer Nikki Hollis said: "It does seem a bit unfair that I am being fined, while this Mr Thompson is not being covered in jam and locked in a big glass box with millions of angry wasps."

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