Eurovision Song Contest 'will justify hard Brexit'

12-05-17

BRITAIN’S performance in tomorrow’s Eurovision Song Contest will justify a hard Brexit, it has been claimed.

Across the UK, Europhobes are anticipating a low score for Britain which proves that we should cut all ties with the continent and station gunboats in the Med.

Norman Steele, from Colchester, said: “Look at them, all awarding each other full marks like an incestuous family. I mean they haven’t yet, but they will. Makes you sick either way.

“Musical giants we are, home of the Beatles, but does that win us a vote from the former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia? Bastards.

“It’s not like we’ve disrespected the competition. I mean that girl came eighth in the X-Factor in 2009, which puts her head-and-shoulders above the best singer in Switzerland.

“How these Remainers think their position is intellectually defensible when these European arseholes will break that poor girl’s heart tomorrow night, I just don’t know.”

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