Jay-Z buys extravagant garden shed

13-01-12

RAPPER Jay-Z has purchased a million-dollar garden shed following the birth of his daughter, it has emerged.

The shed is made of platinum coated in Cuprinol

Sources close to hip hop mogul claim the seven-figure Swarovski shed will be used for a combination of in-law avoidance and general pottering.

Situated in the garden of luxurious Hamptons home Jay-Z shares with his wife Beyonce, the super-deluxe shed has many high-end features including a silver Corbusier-style rack for half-empty pots of Humbrol and a half-finished flat pack shelving unit designed by Georgio Armani.

It is also believed to contain a solid gold Lorraine Schwartz-designed Old Virginia tobacco tin in which the hip-hop superstar can keep boiled sweets, string and fishing tackle.

Jay-Z said in a statement: “Since my crib became an actual crib, Hova be forced to relocate my shit to the bottom of the garden, know wha’m saying?

“Yeah. All you fellas know what I’m talking about”.

He added: “Actually, I just couldn’t face another conversation about whose eyes she’s got.”

“Also folks comparing how various hospitals are now to what they were like at an unspecified earlier point in time, and Beyonce’s nan’s long-ass unfinished anecdotes about what the weather was like when she was born.

“That shit gets real old real quick.”

 

 

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