Arts & Entertainment

All female characters now ludicrously hard

EVERY female character in TV and film is now exceptionally determined and hard as nails.

Big Brother line-up becomes Celebrity Big Brother line-up

THE entire line-up of housemates from the just-completed series of Big Brother last night re-entered the house for Celebrity Big Brother.

Downton Abbey to get a wormhole

A HOLE in the space-time continuum is to allow the makers of Downton Abbey to introduce product placement.

‘Underclass’ delivering value for money

THE ‘underclass’ are giving Britons a sense of superiority for only £30bn a year.

Word ‘class’ to be retired in Bacall’s honour

FOLLOWING the death of Hollywood star Lauren Bacall, the word ‘class’ is to be taken out of circulation.

The Hobbit 'ripped off Willow'

PETER Jackon's The Hobbit trilogy was based on 80s fantasy film Willow, it has been claimed.

Studio regretfully announces Ninja Turtles sequel

THE producers of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles remake have wearily confirmed that they are doing a follow-up.

Cinemagoers confused by characters without superpowers

THE public does not understand film characters who are not superheroes, it has emerged.