Arts & Entertainment

Lemmy confirms he is immortal

MOTORHEAD frontman Lemmy has reassured fans that he is eternal and will never die.

Please stop now, say children in need

NEEDY children across Britain have asked that tonight's Children in Need is the last.

Luke Skywalker not in new Star Wars film because he was always shit

LUKE Skywalker does not appear in the new Star Wars movie because he is the worst character in the series by far, it has been confirmed.

New Teletubbies is 'a f**king travesty' says original fan

THE new series of Teletubbies is an insult to those who have kept its memory all these years, it has been claimed.

Grown men into that card game about wizards and shit

THOUSANDS of adult humans are into that game where you have little cards with pictures of monsters on them.

New PayPal ad features Richard Dawkins explaining why Father Christmas is a lie

PAYPAL’s seasonal advertising campaign stars Richard Dawkins telling children that Father Christmas is a logical impossibility.

A fascinating glimpse inside the Queen’s private sitting room

A RARE image of the monarch’s personal world shows she enjoys many familiar creature comforts.

Fog inspires shit poem

A MAN has written a poor quality poem about the fog.