Arts & Entertainment

Becoming a 'Steampunk' best way to prolong virginity

DRESSING as a Victorian-themed science fiction character is a great way to avoid ever having sex, it has emerged.

Will I Am to appear on £10 note

THE Royal Mint is facing heavy criticism for its decision to put American rapper Will I Am on the new £10 note to be released later this year.

Stone Roses to split up and reform live on stage

ALMOST a quarter of a million people will see legendarily argumentative band The Stone Roses part and get back together live in Manchester this weekend.

Ian Beale to return as a Yardie

EASTENDERS is to become yet more unrealistic with the return of Ian Beale as a Jamaican-style gangster.

Festival with kids to be worst experience imaginable

PEOPLE taking their children to music festivals are going to get exactly what they deserve, it has emerged.

Gary Barlow headlines Stonehenge

FORMER Take That singer Gary Barlow has headlined Stonehenge's annual celebrations in honour of the ancient Earth Goddess.

New Hitman game to feature very realistic women

THE next game in the Hitman series will feature realistic female characters that look like girls you might see on the bus.

Men puzzled by porn that you read

MALES are deeply confused by a new sort of pornography that is both for women and made of words.