Arts & Entertainment
Bruno Re-Cut For MPs
THE makers of x-rated comedy film Bruno have released a re-cut version with added sexual perversity, just for British MPs.
Britain Flocks To Childish Wizard Rubbish
MILLIONS of grown men and women have turned out to watch the latest film based on some childish drivel about a magic boy.
Northern Culture Honoured With Enormous Pie
THE North's contribution to British culture is to be recognised with the installation of a 60ft bronze meat pie in Hyde Park.
Furious Russell T Davies Threatens To Turn BBC Gaylien
TORCHWOOD creator Russell T Davies has reacted angrily to cuts in the series by threatening to turn the BBC's entire TV output into a same-sex inter-galactic love-in.
Mash Radio: Michael Sheen To Play Red Rum
TONY Blair actor Michael Sheen is to extend his repertoire of real-life characters by playing Red Rum in a BBC mini-series.
Dame Judi Dench To Host Charity Swearathon
ACTRESS Dame Judi Dench is to host this year's BAFTA Swearathon, it has been confirmed.
New Big Brother Series May Be Best Ever, Says Its Viewer
THE current series of Big Brother could be the best one yet, according to the person who has been watching it.
Time Traveller From The Future Warns Of Terminator Sequels
A HAUNTED-looking man arrived from the future last night to warn mankind of Terminator sequels so incredibly bad they will make you cry inside.