Arts & Entertainment

Man defeats Mark Zuckerberg to become first person to complete Facebook

A MAN has become the first person to complete Facebook after defeating 'end boss' Mark Zuckerberg, it has emerged.

What a great song, Stone Roses fan tells himself

A FAN of The Stone Roses has lied to himself and friends by saying how much he loves the band’s new single All For One.

If you touch CBeebies we will destroy you, parents warn government

PARENTS of children under six have warned the government that if it lays a finger on CBeebies they will burn Westminster down.

Man permanently scarred by four-star review of Radiohead album

A RADIOHEAD fan will never fully recover from reading a four-star review of their new album, it has emerged.

Animals see Attenborough shows as moronic reality TV

WILDLIFE species have criticised David Attenborough as a maker of mind-numbing reality television obsessed with chimp family disputes.

Non-Londoners don’t listen to podcasts because they are not constantly bored and lonely

PODCASTS are not listened to outside London because people there have friends, research has discovered.

Leicester win exposing public to toxic levels of Kasabian

MILLIONS have been exposed to potentially deadly levels of Kasabian following Leicester City’s title win.

New Radiohead album a series of party megamixes

THOM Yorke has confirmed his new album will be the perfect Ibiza soundtrack.