Arts & Entertainment

Pirates of the Caribbean 5 ‘accurately depicts tedium of 18th century sea travel’

THE latest Pirates of the Caribbean film has been praised for recreating the boredom and restlessness of 18th Century sea voyages.

Everyone finally able to admit Roger Moore was best Bond

ROGER Moore was the best Bond even if it was never cool to say that, everyone has admitted.

49 year-old at rock gig realises he’s easily the youngest person there

A 49 year-old indie rock fan was the definitely youngest person at a gig in Camden, it has emerged.

Eurovision Song Contest 'will justify hard Brexit'

BRITAIN’S performance in tomorrow’s Eurovision Song Contest will justify a hard Brexit, it has been claimed.

Father weeps tears of joy on realising he has seen his last Peppa Pig

THE father of a four-year-old wept tears of unashamed joy upon realising he will never watch Peppa Pig again for the rest of his life.

Man cuts all contact with mother after discovering she likes ‘Galway Girl’

A 29-YEAR-OLD man has cut off all contact with his mother after discovering she enjoys Ed Sheeran’s song Galway Girl. 

Original velociraptors to return for Jurassic World 2

THE velociraptors who starred in Jurassic Park will join the cast of the upcoming Jurassic World sequel, they have confirmed.

Woman never realised musicals were that shit

A WOMAN who had never been to a musical before had no idea they were quite so awful, she has admitted.