Arts & Entertainment
A TEENAGER has vowed to shun anything of artistic value for the rest of his life.
SETTLING down with kids and a mortgage is an incredible achievement that surpasses anything else, according to a man whose other plans failed.
A MAN is hugely anticipating a weekend in July when he will be able to stay at home and not attend a music festival, it has emerged.
A FAN of Queen has realised that everything about the band is ridiculous.
THE mating season for nerds has begun early with the release of the trailer for Star Wars: Rogue One.
THE writers of Radio 4 drama The Archers have been urged to kill off the entire village in an orgy of random violence.
THE BBC has unveiled an ambitious timetable to begin using actors who did not go to public school.
THE title of the film Batman v Superman makes absolutely no sense to most people, it has been confirmed.
- The Night Manager climax leaked by someone who has read the book
- Family with no telly just knows nothing about telly
- Son laughs as father plays him Stone Roses album
- Crufts winners don’t look like that in real life, say bitter ordinary dogs
- Tits and Dragons is a much better name, agrees George R R Martin