Arts & Entertainment
THE producers of Coronation Street have been urged to bring back the little fat man with the bow tie and the glasses.
NEW BBC series The Musketeers has been condemned for portraying Alexandre Dumas's characters as human rather than canine.
THE least cool half of The Beatles are reforming to play at the Grammy Awards in Los Angeles.
CULTURE is reaching a point of maximum dumbness, it has been claimed.
ALL classical music including Beethoven, Bach, and Mozart is to be reclassified as film music.
EVERYONE in Britain has become left wing because of the baddie in Sherlock.
RAPPER Pitbull has admitted he only ever performs the shittest bits of his records.
VIEWERS of Channel 5's Celebrity Big Brother have been scrubbing themselves all night but still feel dirty.