Prodigy remix everything from the 1970s

THE Prodigy have delighted fans by remixing every piece of pop culture ephemera from the 1970s.

Richard Nixon and Ted Heath starred in ‘Herbie Rides Again’

The band’s new album includes a punk-influenced rave remix of everything ever recorded between the first of January 1970 and the last day of 1979.

Frontman Keith Flint said: “Everyone loved ‘Charly’, so the logical creative progression was a remix of the road safety awareness films starring Tufty the Squirrel.

“After that it just felt natural to put a jungle-influenced bassline on the 1978 Cinzano adverts featuring Joan Collins and Leonard Rossiter.

“We then realised there was still a wealth of untapped material from the 1970s, resulting in a dance remix of the Jackanory theme and a hard house version of the music from The Onedin Line.

“Of course it’s easy to rest on your laurels, so we took a more soulful, almost R&B approach to ‘For Mash Get Smash’, featuring the Smash robots.”

Music critics have applauded the new album, with the NME singling out the drum-and-bass version of the speeches of Ted Heath about the OPEC oil crisis.

Office worker Tom Logan said: “My girlfriend and I dropped a couple of white doves and it was like 1995, or possibly 1975, all over again.”

 

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Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Capricorn (22 DEC-19 JAN)
On Tuesday you’ll be marking eight years of sobriety. It’s been spread over 25 years of piss-artistry, but still.
Aquarius (20 JAN-19 FEB)
Judging by the smell in your train carriage on Monday, somebody’s office is having a ‘Bring a Full Laundry Basket to Work Day’.

Pisces (20 FEB-20 MAR)
Since his promotion from head of Human Resources, the 70s kids TV star is known as Associate Director Pufnstuf these days.

Aries (21 MAR-19 APR)
This weekend you’ll take the fact that Google auto-completes ‘Porn addiction’ before it gets to ‘Pornhub’ as some kind of personal slight.

Taurus (20 APRIL – 20 MAY)
You often implore people to improve themselves by ‘cracking open a book once in a while’. That’s why everyone hates your guts.

Gemini (21 MAY-20 JUN)
At a government meeting to decide what other things we can copy from France that don’t stop terrorism, you suggest ‘nationalised railways’ and ‘cheap wine’.

Cancer (21 JUN-22 JUL)
Saturn enters your house this week, then sits himself down on your sofa and demands a bong.

Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)
On Saturday you’ll have a furious argument in the supermarket over whether it was a £10 note or a £20 note but either way you get arrested for stealing from the till.

Virgo (23 AUG-22 SEP)
Why not celebrate record-low levels of interest this week? Or console yourself? I’m never really sure which it’s meant to be.

Libra (23 SEP-23 OCT)
While the Consumer Goods Act is perfectly clear on your statutory rights to demand a refund when items have been sold with a deliberately misleading description, I still feel that meeting in the squat you have booked with those four yardies is a bad idea.

Scorpio (24 OCT-21 NOV)
Well, yes, I suppose a conspiracy orchestrated over many years by shadowy billionaire oligarchs MIGHT have been uncovered by somebody who lives in his mum’s spare room.

Sagittarius (22 NOV-21 DEC)
‘Cos the players gonna play, play, play, play, play. And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate. Do you understand what nouns are now?