Confusion as banker arrested for losing vast amount of money

THERE was widespread confusion today after a banker was arrested for losing billions of pounds.

Nope, wasn't him

Kweku Adoboli, a trader with UBS, was charged earlier today with making incredibly bad decisions in the wrong way.

The loss is the latest blow for the Swiss bank which had to be bailed out in 2008 after it lost billions of pounds as a result of making a series of incredibly bad decisions.

It was one of the biggest casualties of the banking crisis which saw dozens of European and American banks lose billions and billions of pounds in a way that was fantastically legal.

Tom Logan, a graphic designer from Stevenage, said: “But if he’s…? Then what about…? Surely…?

“No, sorry, I don’t understand.”

Margaret Gerving, a retired headmistress from Guildford, added: “From what I understand he’s accused of investing some money, losing it and then hoping no-one would find out.

“I’m sure I remember something similar from about three and a half years ago. No, not that poor little French chap.

“Now what was it? I’m sorry I’m getting a bit forgetful. Oh I know what it was, it was the entire Western banking system.

“And this fellow’s been arrested, you say? Oh well at least they’re finally cracking down.

“Good for them.”