BRITAIN will oppose an EU ban on gently warming the testicles of bankers.
BRITISH Gas will take on 1,000 young people over the next three years and teach them how to be unremitting bastards.
WORKING from home is great - it's almost like being free.
THE Royal Mail is offering to bury the heap of marketing bullshit it would otherwise put through your letterbox.
BRITAIN'S abattoirs need more contemporary styling, it has been claimed.
THE Royal Bank of Scotland has been ordered to spend 390 million hours performing good deeds as punishment for its part in the Libor scandal.