Business

British Gas raises then freezes electricity prices 'as a favour'

BRITISH Gas has raised electicity prices by 12.5 per cent then immediately frozen them, as a favour to their customers.

Estate agents sure everyone will be nice to them on their way down

ESTATE agents facing falling profits are confident everyone will be as kind to them on their way down as they have been to others on their way up.

New employee begins yet another conversation designed to find out who smokes weed

A NEW employee at a design agency has begun yet another conversation aimed at discovering which of his colleagues smokes cannabis.

People with loads of debt confident banks will return favour and bail them out

BRITISH households in dangerous levels of debt are confident that the banks will return the favour and bail them out this time.

Southern Rail improves dramatically after work experience kid takes charge

SOUTHERN Rail’s punctuality has improved by 68 percent after the franchise was taken over by a 16-year-old on work experience.

Cash in hand way better than 'rights'

CASH-IN-HAND payments are way better than sick pay, pension rights and all that other nonsense, tradesmen have confirmed.

UK businesses ‘not positive enough’ about huge meteor heading towards London

INTERNATIONAL trade secretary Liam Fox has complained that UK businesses are ‘ignoring the opportunities’ offered by the meteor set to impact central London in 2019.

Women disgusting, says Dove

WOMEN are icky and only our products can save them, Dove has claimed.