Business

Workers 'Need More Pretend Training With Overpaid Bullshit Merchants'

WORKERS are being asked to attend more pretend training sessions in a bid to increase the amount of bullshit there is.

Ryanair Passengers Pay Extra £10 Not To Be Blown Out Of The Sky

RAF fighter jets are being scrambled on a regular basis as part of a Ryanair scheme to make passengers pay a £10 surcharge for not being killed.

O'Leary, Warns Ba Boss

BRITISH Airlines staff have been told that Michael O’Leary will be made their new chief executive unless they call off their strike action.

Mclaren Launch Supercar For The Arse On A Budget

FORMULA 1 manufacturer Mclaren has unveiled a budget supercar targeted at the insecure arse with only £150,000 to waste.

Nostradamus Predicted 2010 'Would Be Bad Year For Buy-To-Let'

THE prophecies of Nostradamus include warnings about fluctuations in the UK property market, it was claimed yesterday.

Scottish And Southern Cuts Prices Just In Time For Summer


SCOTTISH and Southern Energy has made the bold move of cutting its prices to coincide with it getting lighter and warmer of an evening.

Honda Jazz Filled With Scorpions

CAR giant Honda last night confirmed that its Jazz supermini hatchback is full of deadly scorpions.