Britain to continue cupping bankers' testicles

BRITAIN will oppose an EU  ban on gently warming the testicles of bankers.

British Gas to hire 1,000 trainee bastards

BRITISH Gas will take on 1,000 young people over the next three years and teach them how to be unremitting bastards.

The Mash Guide to Working From Home

WORKING from home is great - it's almost like being free.

Royal Mail launches letter-burying service

THE Royal Mail is offering to bury the heap of marketing bullshit it would otherwise put through your letterbox.

Abattoirs to get funky makeover

BRITAIN'S abattoirs need more contemporary styling, it has been claimed.

RBS given 390 million hours of community service

THE Royal Bank of Scotland has been ordered to spend 390 million hours performing good deeds as punishment for its part in the Libor scandal.