Stupid business idea sickeningly successful

A TERRIBLE business idea has made an entrepreneur undeservedly rich, it has emerged.

Tesco to close 43 of its 400 million stores

RETAILER Tesco has confirmed that it is shutting more than one in every 10 million of its UK stores.

Loyalty card holders ‘must show total loyalty’

ALL loyalty card holders must show complete obedience, supermarkets have announced.

We just want to put you in prison, admit tax people

SENIOR tax officials have admitted that their sole agenda is to get self-employed people into prison cells.

Christmas tree seller predicts rapid growth over next four months

A ROADSIDE Christmas tree seller has confidently predicted that business will go from strength to strength.

Cereal cafe exactly the sort of irritating nonsense you wish you’d thought of

A CAFE specialising in cereal is the sort of maddening hipster idiocy you would be up to if they hadn’t come up with it first.

Christmas jumpers make being fired such jolly fun

A JUNIOR accountant’s disciplinary proceedings were full of festive cheer because everyone involved was wearing a Christmas jumper.

McNuggets made with organic, fresh child meat

MCDONALD’S has revealed that its nuggets contain locally-sourced boy.