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WATER MADE FROM GAS, SAY WATER COMPANIES |
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WATER companies last night defended their above inflation price rises insisting water was now made from very expensive gas.
 A gas convoy en route to Deptford
According to Thames Water, the gases around the UK can only be used to make Fanta and Tizer, both of which are safe to drink, but absolutely useless if you want to soak your knickers.
A company spokesman said: "Our fresh, delicious water is made using only the finest gases from the orient.
"Our gasologists trawl through the exotic casbahs of Mongolia and Balukistan selecting those gases that possess the perfect balance of moistness and flavour.
"We must then haggle with the local maharajahs who laugh heartily and threaten us with big curvy swords and ask our women to dance.
"The precious cargo is loaded ever so carefully onto a camel train and transported through the desert back to our treatment plant on the outskirts of Deptford."
He added: "Only when the gases have been blended to perfection do we then add the faint whiff of bodily waste and a generous helping of Domestos."
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