Boris Johnson ‘may have accidentally sold Britain to Peruvian drug lord’

16-08-16

Prime Ministerial handover, Downing Street, London, UK - 13 Jul 2016

BRITAIN now belongs to a Peruvian drug lord after an ‘accident’ by Boris Johnson.

Officials confirmed the Foreign Secretary answered the door to a ‘salesmen’ who claimed he had an appointment.

A Downing Street spokesman said: “The chap had a Powerpoint presentation and some pamphlets and basically the upshot is by next week we all have to speak Spanish and hand over all the food in our cupboards.

“Boris seems very pleased with the briefcase full of odd-looking currency they left him, despite the fact the notes spell ’50’ wrong.”

It is not known if Britain’s new owner wants to keep the country intact before selling  it on, or break it down for parts.

Meanwhile, officials are attempting to prevent Johnson doing anything else while he is foreign secretary. The spokesman added: “We’re keeping him occupied by pretending we need his help to beat up a journalist. He likes that.”

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