Carrie Fisher feelings resurface in 40-somethings

CONFUSING urges about Carrie Fisher have returned amongst middle-aged people after a 30-year absence.

With the Princess Leia actress appearing on chat shows while clearly not giving a shit, a groundswell of strong emotions have been reported across the country.

Martin Bishop, from Stevenage, said: “When I was 10 I’d imagine saving her from Jabba while she was wearing that bikini and she’d reward me by going for a Wimpy.

“As a middle-aged bloke I now imagine smoking a load of fags with her and getting shitfaced on gin before falling asleep together on the sofa, but the effect on my ability to concentrate is much the same.

“Neither of these are sexual fantasies as such, but there’s little doubt they’re coming from an understanding that I absolutely, definitely would.”

Force Awakens actress Daisy Ridley has been told she can look forward to being the subject of strong, unexpressed urges for the next 40 years and is considering giving it all up to live in a cave without an internet connection.

Women have also admitted to having feelings about Fisher, with many having had dreams where they shoot lots of stormtroopers together.