Fergie returns to Windsor Castle to pilfer leftovers

THE Duchess of York is back at the royal wedding venue stuffing canapes into a bin bag, it has been confirmed.

Fergie arrived at Windsor Castle this morning claiming she had dropped an earring, but was later found cramming savouries and fruit into a plastic bag.

She said: “So far I’ve got half a roast chicken, a shitload of cheese and a massive bunch of grapes. I mean, it’d be a shame if it all went to waste.

“I’ll probably give it to charity or something, depending on how it goes.”

Fergie added: “I found some little pastry things with prawns on too, but I think prawns can be a bit dodgy if they’re left out.

“I’ll give one to a corgi and see what happens.”