ACTOR Kevin Bacon is unsure if he is seen as a cultural icon or a bit of a dick.
THE Mayor of London has been filmed pulling a pin from a grenade with his teeth, throwing it into a black cab and cycling away before it explodes.
NEW Top Gear presenter Chris Evans is trying to decide which of his sycophantic pals will join him as co-presenters.
STONEHENGE is sick of being linked with hippies and wants to rebrand itself as a destination for cool people.
THE Magna Carta is shit compared to the latest photos of Prince George, it has been agreed.
THE Queen’s new open-topped Range Rover has a machine gun on the rear at her personal request.
FANS of Country Life butter have accused their hero John Lydon of selling his soul to corporate consumerism.
BRITAIN has told the Duchess of Cambridge that her pathetically sentimental baby photos should stay on Facebook where they belong.