Davina Mccall Forced To Eat Own Foot
HEAVY snow across the south east of England last night forced Big Brother presenter Davina McCall to eat her own foot.
McCall had been road testing Garnier's new, all-weather Revitalift chin nourishing gel when at least 200,000 skin-deadening snowflakes crashed into the side of her car on the A21 near Sevenoaks.
Quickly realising she was not on television and the nearest camera was more than two days away by snow shoe, McCall telephoned BBC FiveLive to let them know her chin looked and felt fabulous.
But she added: "The Garnier helicopter is unable to get through. My feet are very cold. If only I could get out and dance like the stars of my new Sky One show Got To Dance."
After a few minutes McCall became delirious, drifting in and out of consciousness. Moments later she said: "My right foot has gone completely numb. I suppose I should take this opportunity to eat it without hurting myself."
The BBC presenters tried desperately to dissuade her before they were bombarded with texts and emails from thousands of angry listeners telling them to mind their own business.
McCall then attempted to deliver a running commentary on her foot-meal but her speech became increasingly muffled as she devoured her toes before working her way steadily towards the ankle.
After six minutes of chewing she let out a colossal belch and began interviewing herself in a frenzied manner which BBC doctors stressed was completely normal for Davina McCall.
Meanwhile the Met Office has repeated its warning that it's, you know, snowing a lot, so just stay indoors for a couple of days and watch telly.
A spokesman added: "Unless, of course, your chin is fully protected and you have at least three days worth of feet."