Environment

Britain to probably have some electricity

THERE is a reasonable chance Britain will still have electricity in two year's time, according to the government's long-awaited energy bill.

'Loyal' penguin's 10,000 mile journey includes brothel detour

MAGELLANIC penguins, supposedly nature's most loyal animals, have a whorehouse on their migration route.

Banana-based society sounds fantastic, says everyone

A WORLD in which bananas are the main thing sounds absolutely brilliant, it has been agreed.

This particular hurricane isn't God's judgement, say swivel-eyed preachers

HURRICANE Sandy is just an unfortunate bout of bad weather, according to America's right-wing clerics.

Attenborough filmed us having sex, say animals

BBC star David Attenborough regularly filmed animals copulating, it has been claimed.

Man-o-war 'uses tentacles for sleazy groping'

MEN-O-WAR sting swimmers then feel them up with their tentacles, it has been claimed.

Environment accused of benefit fraud

THE environment has been accused of wasting taxpayer’s money on virtually useless plants and animals.