Environment

Shark attacked by British holidaymakers

A GREAT WHITE shark escaped with cuts and bruises after straying into coastal waters full of British drunks.

Britain's skies unprepared for massive volcanic cloud AGAIN

DAVID Cameron has pledged a full-scale inquiry as it emerged that British airspace is unable to deal with an enormous volcanic cloud for the second year in a row.

Trains to have full pony access by 2015

THE shake-up of Britain's rail system is to include a multi-million project to make all trains, stations and platforms pony compliant within four years.

Global warming real again

RECORD spring temperatures across the UK have raised concerns that global warming might be a real thing after all.

Police disturb illegal lake monster fighting gang

CONSTABLES called to a nocturnal disturbance in Windermere found a group of men cheering two battling plesiosaurs, it has emerged.

Government u-turn on workshy trees

THE government has abandoned plans to force trees off benefits and into work.

M25 'just ends up back where it started'

THE M25 is a huge waste of money that goes round in a loop and just ends up back where it started, according to a devastating new report.

Northern gibbons are lazy thieves, say scientists

PRIMATES from the northern half of rainforests are more likely to be dishonest than their southerly counterparts, scientists have claimed.