Cameron to visit big, grey cloud

DAVID Cameron will today visit one of the big, grey clouds over Britain in a bid to ‘get a handle’ on rain.

Environment Agency to fill Somerset with piranhas

THE Environment Agency is to step up its attack on Somerset with more than two million carnivorous fish.

Devon launches 'Absolutely crawling with beaver' tourism campaign

DEVON is promoting itself as the top holiday destination for lovers of beaver.

News mainly pictures of waves

NEWS editors have confirmed that they are mostly going to be doing pictures of waves for the time being.

Fracking thing starting to feel completely insane

THE search for shale gas in the UK is beginning to feel as if it might be psychotic, it has emerged.

Cats into people humour

CATS love any quirky and winsome humour associated with people, it has emerged.

Rest of UK excited about underwater London

NEW projections that London will be reclaimed by the sea have been greeted enthusiastically by the rest of the country.

Dogs ready to have senses overloaded

DOGS around the UK are determined not to lose it this year when the banging starts.