Environment

Banana-based society sounds fantastic, says everyone

A WORLD in which bananas are the main thing sounds absolutely brilliant, it has been agreed.

This particular hurricane isn't God's judgement, say swivel-eyed preachers

HURRICANE Sandy is just an unfortunate bout of bad weather, according to America's right-wing clerics.

Attenborough filmed us having sex, say animals

BBC star David Attenborough regularly filmed animals copulating, it has been claimed.

Man-o-war 'uses tentacles for sleazy groping'

MEN-O-WAR sting swimmers then feel them up with their tentacles, it has been claimed.

Environment accused of benefit fraud

THE environment has been accused of wasting taxpayer’s money on virtually useless plants and animals.

Naive young grouse excited about the 'grouse season'

JUVENILE grouse Tom Logan is incredibly excited about the forthcoming grouse season, due to a misunderstanding about what is involved.

Joyless carp-processing season begins

THOUSANDS of men have resumed their hobby of processing carp at man-made industrial carp holes.