Is it too late to give the Queen Mother an aspirin?
DOCTORS are under renewed pressure to give aspirin to the Queen Mother.
Campaigners say the wonder pill could bring her back to life and make everything the way it shoud be.
Helen Archer, from Stevenage, said: “Britain just hasn’t been the same since she passed away. It’s all angry and full of prima donnas.
“When she was alive everyone was nice and we all had money and the television wasn’t awash with sluts.
“Give her an aspirin. What harm could it possibly do?”
Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: “At this stage it’s impossible to predict how the Queen Mother will respond to a daily aspirin.
“I am very slightly skeptical but five minutes ago we had no idea that aspirin prevented cancer.
“Like the Royal Family itself, aspirin is a wonder drug that surprises us almost as often as it leads to blood in our stool.”
Nathan Muir, from Doncaster added: “We should at least see what it says on the packet.”