Health

Man visits Post Office without catching anything

A 38-YEAR-OLD male has confounded medical experts by visiting a post Office in December without getting anyone's cold.

Avoid oysters if you're a pussy, say manly experts

THE risk of Norovirus means that oysters are unsuitable for anyone lacking a pair of balls, it has been claimed.

Doctors may be forced to work weekends

NHS hospitals could soon be staffed with doctors at weekends.

Millions trying to wash away the awfulness

SHOWERS are taking twice as long as 20 years ago as people desperately try to scrub off the 21st century, say researchers.

Andrew Lansley to watch you while you sleep

HEALTH secretary Andrew Lansley is to sit next to hospital patients, looking at them while they sleep.

Scientists warn of fog metaphors

EXPERTS have warned the dense fog over greater London will be used as a metaphor.

Middle class ketamine users 'risk delusions of cool'

RECREATIONAL sedative ketamine can induce the false belief of coolness in well-heeled teenagers, scientists have claimed.

Lansley sets 18 week hospital closure deadline

HEALTH secretary Andrew Lansley has pledged that nobody should wait more than 18 weeks before their local hospital is closed.