Health

Bored humans running to the point of exhaustion

MILLIONS are running until their legs give out just for something to do.

Having a fight 'best way to burn off calories'

BRAWLING is the most effective way to shed excess weight, according to doctors.

Sugar definitely worst thing say same people who said it was definitely fat

THE people who were utterly convinced that fat was the worst thing are now utterly convinced that it is sugar.

One in five using A&E as a car boot sale

ONE in five people admitted to accident and emergency units are setting up a stall and selling second hand goods.

Helpful scientists reveal perfect number of cigarettes

SCIENTISTS have helpfully revealed the number of risk-free cigarettes you can smoke every week.

Put cancer in e-cigarettes, say non-smokers

NON-SMOKERS would prefer electronic cigarettes to be fatal, it has emerged.

Massage is the most stressful experience

MASSAGES are the opposite of soothing, it has emerged.

Single people sick of being told sex is good for them

PEOPLE who are not getting any sex are tired of hearing about the health benefits of lovemaking.