Health

Absolutely Everything Can Kill You, Warns Department Of Health

EVERYTHING will carry a government warning label, under plans to prevent anything from happening, the Department of Health has announced.

Wonder Drug Boosts Desire For Sex And Chips

SCIENTISTS have discovered a wonder drug that increases women’s appetite for sexual intimacy and fast food.

White Wine 'Good For Getting You Fired' Say Docs

DRINKING four or five large glasses of white wine at an office night out increases your chances of being sacked by up to 80 per cent, new research shows.

Cillit Bang to run NHS

POWERFUL household cleaner Cillit Bang has been awarded a five year contract to run the National Health Service.

£50m Campaign On How To Go To The Toilet

HEALTH minister Andy Kerr today launched a multi-million pound initiative to teach Scots how to go to the lavatory.