Health

Both ends, says Queen

IT is literally exploding out of both ends, Buckingham Palace has announced.

Febreze ads trigger hepatitis epidemic

ADVERTS for Febreze 'fabric refresher' have caused numerous cases of hepatitis.

Everything to be labelled with terrifying images of death

ALL products will soon feature graphic imagery illustrating how they might kill you.

Fat people should be 'encouraged' to hate themselves, say doctors

DOCTORS have called for a new approach to obesity which gently encourages overweight people to despise the very idea of themselves.

Horsemeat: French finally blamed

AN inquiry has been launched into why it has taken a month to blame the horsemeat scandal on the French.

You're on your own, says Food Standards Agency

THE Food Standards Agency last night admitted there is nothing more it can do.