Staying up all night playing computer games not insomnia, teenagers told

PLAYING Red Dead Redemption until dawn is not a recognised medical condition, doctors have confirmed.

Increasing numbers of under-21s have self-diagnosed as insomniacs thanks to their reluctance to sleep while there’s zombies to be shot.

Nikki Hollis, a GP, said: “I used to think I suffered from insomnia as a student, but it turns out I was just raving until 6am four nights a week. The problems went away when I stopped.

“Being unable to sleep is quite different to not sleeping because you are doing fun stuff and cannot delay your gratification to a more civil hour.”

Student Wayne Hayes said: “Sometimes I’m tossing and turning all night long trying to complete a dynastic alliance with Aquitaine in Crusader Kings 2. And other times I haven’t slept a wink because I’m chasing promotion with Barnet in Football Manager.

“I’ve been self-medicating with crisps and cans of Monster, which has alleviated the worst of the symptoms, but I really think I need to be signed off college for a week or two until I’ve won the Champions League.”