France Redeems Itself With Airplane Fatso Plan
HUNDREDS of years of British animosity toward the French were written off last night after Air France said it would make fatty buy two seats.
The airline announced the policy change after its pilots demanded a 45% salary increase for having to shift the throttle slightly further in order to get rotund passengers off the ground.
But now the Foreign Office has predicted new avenues of co-operation between the countries after UK ministers applauded Air France's stupendous balls.
Foreign Secretary, David Miliband, said: "Anyone who has sat motionless and horrified as arm fat spills onto their chicken kiev while trying to watch Miss Congeniality en route to Orlando will join me in setting aside the wars, the sheep-burnings and the panoply of body odour issues.
"They're prosecuting Scientologists, their first lady is a tremendous pump and have you tasted Chablis recently?
"Mes amis français, Grande-Bretagne est très désolé."
As a first step towards the new entente-cordiale the French Embassy in London is organising a series of seminars for British business leaders on innovative ways to give their idiot customers the corporate finger.
An Air France spokesman said; "We have always stayed true to our customer service pledge of letting them know we think they are vulgar pieces of shit.
"I take great delight in pissing on our passengers, and their fat, stinking, badly-dressed mothers."
Meanwhile the Home Office is to seek advice from the French on tackling immigration, though there are concerns any French-influenced policy would involve simply rounding them up and handing them over to the Germans.